I can’t say I’ve met everyone in the world (one day!), but it’s pretty easy these days to believe that there are a lot of terrible people out there. And some recent situations I’ve gotten caught up in (as a customer) have confirmed this. But I want to take a moment to reflect on the wonderful, kind, decent people that I encountered recently and am sure to meet in my continuing wander.
Owning a car is pain in the ass, and dealing with the people who deal with cars can sometimes be even more of a pain in the ass. So when I went back to the Toyota dealership that sold me my car (and took advantage of me to extract some questionable fees) to pick up my NY license plates last week, I was expecting pains to be inflicted on my ass. I was not disappointed.
I had been told that one of the aforementioned questionable fees went toward a free key replacement service. (Side note: the contract for this service explicitly states that it is complimentary… so no dice.) So while I was there last week, I figured I should get my money’s worth and at least get myself a spare key. Well needless to say, this was harder than I wanted it to be, but there were two shining points of light in the black hole that was that car sales department: Kelly in sales and Jason in service.
Kelly was the person who’d reached out to me after my initial complaint that I was feeling icky after my experience buying the car. She’d worked in sales for a long time, but she asked to get into customer service as well, because sales was just sucking her soul out. She was pleasant, empathetic, and made an effort to make things right. (She got part of the way there.) I was so glad to have met her in person when I came through. She helped me navigate the initial steps of my spare key saga, and then I excitedly showed her the minivan. We chatted about capitalism and the inhumanity of this “daily grind” culture, and she eagerly asked to follow my journey on Instagram.
Jason is the manager in the service/repair department, and while his demeanor couldn’t be further from Kelly’s enthusiastic energy, Jason exudes a sort of quiet confidence wrapped in a package of humility and decency. Jason picked up the ball on getting me my key replacement and approached it with a “Not a problem” attitude. I was almost out the door when Jason informed me that there was some trouble getting the replacement approved, and it was stuck with (you guessed it) the sales department. Jason accompanied me to the sales desk, and after some curt conversation and exasperated huffs from the sales manager, I was asked to wait while things got sorted out. A few minutes later, Jason came up and handed me the keys. “You’re good,” he told me. “You shouldn’t have to wait around while they figure this out.” He told me that one way or another, I wouldn’t have to worry about this, and he sent me on my way. It made me feel good.
I had spent a lot of money with these folks, so I guess this sort of decent treatment might be considered the bare minimum. At the same time, no one should have to cough up money to be treated with kindness and dignity. But I’m learning that, in all likelihood, there are just some people who are going to be jerks to you no matter what you do. They’re the easy ones to avoid. It’s the folks who pretend to be nice because they want something from you who are harder to spot and avoid. But therein lies the difference between niceness and kindness. I would argue that kind people act kind. Unkind people act nice. If you get a whiff of niceness, look under the hood for kindness; if it’s not there, turn the other way.
Before I conclude, I want to tell you about one final lovely human that I encountered on that car-errand-filled afternoon. After I was done with the dealership, I went to get my car inspected at a nearby repair shop, and I met Jackie, a proprietor of the shop. Jackie was as kind and personable as could be. She made very pleasant conversation, and she was delighted to hear about my wander and giddy as a schoolgirl when I gave her a tour of the van. She just thought it was so cool, and she called over some other employees to give them a look! She really made my day, and I had to snap a photo of her. As we wrapped up our conversation, Jackie even gave me the name of a friend who owns a farm in Pennsylvania, and she suggested I reach out! If you’re ever in Suffern, NY and need your car fixed, stop by Hallett Place Automotive (this is an unpaid and unrequested endorsement)!
Building off of my post a few days ago about talking to strangers, I guess I’m already getting a taste for how my wander could take shape. Granted, these conversations weren’t completely unprompted (unprompted conversations are my greatest source of anxiety), but they provide some important data points for me to remember that lots of people are going to be lovely and easy to chat with.